Running on a treadmill is hard

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MRW I keep changing my penis’s hairstyle but my girlfriend still refuses to do sexy things.

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Maybe I should just use the broom.

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A betrayal at the Happiest Place on Earth.

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Reaction of every woman I have slept with when I ask them if they want to have sex with me again.

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MRW somebody told me all I’d grow up to be is a sandwich, but years later I am chosen as one of the few of my species to live peacefully, however I still want to see what it might be like to be a sandwich for a day

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Play with me!

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Fuck Yo Couch

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Fuck Yo Couch

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Fuck Yo Couch

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